'Typical' Development: PRESCHOOL AGE CHILDREN (2 - 5 Years)

Social and Emotional Development
Copies adults and friends
Shows affection for friends without prompting
Takes turns in games
Shows concern for a crying friend
Understands the idea of “mine” and “his” or “hers”
Shows a wide range of emotions
Separates easily from mum and dad
May get upset with major changes in routine
Enjoys doing new things
Plays “Mum” and “Dad”
Is more and more creative with make-believe play
Would rather play with other children than by themselves
Cooperates with other children
Often can’t tell what’s real and what’s make-believe
Talks about what they like and are interested in
Wants to please friends
Wants to be like friends
More likely to agree with rules
Likes to sing, dance, and act
Is aware of gender
Shows more independence (e.g. may visit a neighbour with supervision)
Is sometimes demanding and sometimes very cooperative

Language and Communication
Follows instructions with 2 or 3 steps
Can name most familiar things
Understands words like “in,” “on,” and “under”
Says first name, age, and sex
Names a friend
Says words like “I,” “me,” “we,” and “you” and some plurals (cars, dogs, cats)
Talks well enough for strangers to understand most of the time
Carries on a conversation using 2 to 3 sentences
Knows some basic rules of grammar, such as correctly using “he” and “she”
Sings a song or says a poem from memory
Tells stories
Can say first and last name
Speaks very clearly
Tells a simple story using full sentences
Uses future tense, e.g. “Grandma will be here”
Says name and address

Cognitive (Thinking and Learning)
Can work toys with buttons, levers, and moving parts
Plays make-believe with dolls, animals, and people
Does puzzles with 3 or 4 pieces
Understands what “two” means
Copies a circle with pencil or crayon
Turns book pages one at a time
Builds towers of more than 6 blocks
Screws and unscrews jar lids or turns door handle
Names some colours and some numbers
Understands the idea of counting
Starts to understand time
Remembers parts of a story
Understands the idea of “same” and “different”
Draws a person with 2 to 4 body parts
Uses scissors
Starts to copy some capital letters
Plays board or card games
Tells you what they think is going to happen next in a book
Counts 10 or more things
Can draw a person with at least 6 body parts
Can print some letters or numbers
Copies a triangle and other geometric shapes
Knows about things used every day, like money and food

Motor / Physical Development
Climbs well
Runs easily
Pedals a tricycle (3-wheel bike)
Walks up and down stairs, one foot on each step
Hops and stands on one foot up to 2 seconds
Catches a bounced ball most of the time
Pours, cuts with supervision, and mashes own food
Stands on one foot for 10 seconds or longer
Hops and may be able to skip
Can do a somersault
Uses a fork and spoon and sometimes a table knife
Can use the toilet on their own
Swings and climbs

Home strategies
Follow consistent routines, especially around sleep and transitions
Encourage imaginative play and storytelling
Support independence with dressing, toileting, and helping at home
Validate feelings and help your child name and understand emotions
Use simple language to explain separation or family changes
Provide opportunities for play with peers to build social skills
Read books together about friendships, emotions, and family changes
Use art and drawing as ways for your child to express ideas and emotions

Classroom strategies
Offer structured routines with predictable transitions
Support imaginative and cooperative play with peers
Encourage emotional expression through storytelling and drawing
Teach social problem-solving skills (e.g. turn-taking, asking for help)
Use visual schedules and classroom rules
Provide positive reinforcement for independence and cooperation
Monitor for signs of distress during family changes and provide support
Use books, puppets, and role-play to explore emotions and relationships

ERIKSON’S PSYCHOSOCIAL STAGE: INITIATIVE VS GUILT (3–6 YEARS)

Healthy development – Initiative
Is a self-starter
Accepts challenges
Assumes leadership roles
Sets goals and goes after them
Moves easily and freely with body
Enjoys taking on new tasks and experimenting

Unhealthy development – Guilt
Gets easily discouraged or depressed
Avoids new tasks due to fear of failure
Frequently puts self down or says "I can't"
Shows poor posture or body confidence
Avoids eye contact
Displays low energy or motivation

RESPONSE TO PARENTAL SEPARATION (3–6 YEARS)

Common signs
May blame themselves for the separation
May express anger or sadness through behaviour
Can develop fears about being abandoned
May have nightmares or sleep difficulties
Might withdraw, become more clingy, or act out aggressively
Can struggle with unpredictable emotions but may not have the language to explain them

Home strategies
Talk openly and simply about the separation—avoid blame
Reassure your child that they are loved and not responsible
Keep routines consistent to provide a sense of safety
Use books and storytelling to help children process feelings
Allow space for emotional expression through play or art
Maintain a consistent visitation schedule and prepare the child for transitions

BEHAVIOURAL DIFFICULTIES (3–6 YEARS)

Common signs in preschoolers
Assertiveness increases—frequent “no” or negotiation
Tantrums may still occur, but should be shorter and less intense
Fluctuations between independence (“I can do it myself”) and dependence
Emerging aggression—hitting or pushing—but language for conflict resolution is developing
Difficulty managing disappointment or frustration
May test limits and struggle with impulse control

Home strategies
Use clear and consistent limits—follow through calmly
Support problem-solving and “using words” to express needs
Validate big feelings and model calming strategies
Encourage independence in small daily tasks
Offer limited choices to promote a sense of control
Use positive reinforcement to build cooperative behaviour

Classroom strategies
Maintain predictable routines and visual schedules
Use praise to reinforce cooperation and effort
Support social skill development through structured play and role play
Offer calming spaces and tools for self-regulation
Model problem-solving and turn-taking
Provide clear, gentle guidance when setting limits

Online resources for parents
Raising Children Network – www.raisingchildren.net.au
Parentline – www.parentline.com.au
Emerging Minds – www.emergingminds.com.au
Kids Helpline – www.kidshelpline.com.au

Books: The Invisible String by Patrice Karst
Books: When My Parents Forgot How to Be Friends by Jennifer Moore-Mallinos