'Typical' Development: Adolescence (12-18 Years)

Social and Emotional Development
Develops a stronger personal identity and may explore different roles and values
Shifts focus toward peer relationships and spends more time with friends
May seek independence from parents while still needing guidance and boundaries
Becomes more self-aware and concerned with appearance and peer approval
Experiences intense emotions and mood swings due to hormonal changes
Can form romantic relationships and begin exploring sexual identity
Values privacy and personal space
May engage in risk-taking behaviour or test limits
Begins thinking about future goals and personal beliefs
Shows increasing ability to empathise and consider others’ perspectives
May experience conflict between family expectations and peer influences

Language and Communication
Uses complex language for reasoning, debating, and expressing abstract ideas
Understands sarcasm, metaphors, and layered meanings
Communicates in more nuanced, adult-like conversations
May shift communication style depending on social context (e.g., with adults vs. peers)
May withdraw or become less communicative with parents during periods of stress
Can discuss emotions, beliefs, and hypothetical situations
May enjoy creative or persuasive writing and storytelling
Begins developing their own opinions and viewpoints
Often communicates heavily through digital platforms and social media

Cognitive (Thinking and Learning)
Thinks more abstractly and critically
Develops ability to consider hypothetical scenarios and future consequences
Improves problem-solving, planning, and decision-making skills
May question rules, traditions, and authority figures as part of identity formation
Can evaluate multiple sides of an issue and form independent opinions
Begins to establish long-term goals for education or career
May be easily influenced by peer pressure and impulse in earlier adolescence
Improves time management and organisational skills (with support)
Can engage in metacognition (thinking about thinking)
May struggle with emotional decision-making despite strong reasoning skills

Motor / Physical Development
Experiences rapid physical changes during puberty, including height, weight, and body shape
Develops increased strength, coordination, and stamina
Begins menstruation (females) or shows signs of sexual maturity (males and females)
May feel awkward or uncoordinated during growth spurts
Needs more sleep due to hormonal changes affecting circadian rhythm
May become self-conscious about physical appearance or development
Engages in a wide range of physical activities or may become more sedentary
May experience acne, body odour, and other puberty-related physical issues
Typically gains full control over fine and gross motor skills by late adolescence

Home strategies
Keep open lines of communication—listen more than you talk
Set clear expectations around behaviour, technology use, and safety
Support healthy independence while maintaining consistent boundaries
Encourage participation in extracurricular activities and social engagement
Normalise the emotional ups and downs of adolescence
Be available, non-judgemental, and patient—connection is key
Help your teen learn to problem-solve and reflect on their choices
Talk openly about puberty, relationships, consent, and mental health
Support good sleep hygiene and nutrition habits
Recognise and validate their growing maturity and autonomy

Classroom strategies
Foster respectful teacher-student relationships based on trust and mutual respect
Provide opportunities for student voice and leadership
Support emotional regulation and peer relationships through SEL programs
Use collaborative learning and critical thinking tasks
Offer structured support for time management and organisation
Encourage self-reflection and goal-setting
Be aware of mental health risks and provide access to wellbeing staff
Balance challenge with support—students vary widely in maturity
Incorporate real-world relevance into learning content
Use positive reinforcement and consistent, fair consequences

ERIKSON’S PSYCHOSOCIAL STAGE: IDENTITY VS ROLE CONFUSION (12–18 YEARS)

Healthy development – Identity
Explores different values, roles, and beliefs
Forms a stable sense of self and future direction
Feels comfortable with individuality and peer group belonging
Develops personal values, goals, and preferences
Establishes stronger autonomy from family while maintaining connection
Builds close friendships and may begin romantic relationships

Unhealthy development – Role Confusion
Feels unsure or anxious about self or future
Frequently changes appearance, interests, or social groups
Struggles to make decisions independently
Feels pressure to conform or seeks excessive approval
May show withdrawal, rebellion, or intense mood swings
Experiences difficulty forming close relationships

RESPONSE TO PARENTAL SEPARATION (12–18 YEARS)

Common signs
May appear indifferent while experiencing significant inner distress
Can feel embarrassed, angry, or overly responsible
Might withdraw from family or become overly independent
Academic performance may drop or become inconsistent
May reject one parent or side with another
Could act out through risk-taking or defiance
Might develop anxiety or depression related to future, stability, or loyalty

Home strategies
Provide honest, respectful, and age-appropriate information
Allow space for the adolescent to express emotions without judgment
Maintain routines and family responsibilities
Avoid placing adolescent in the middle of adult conflicts
Encourage ongoing relationship with both parents when safe
Provide consistent emotional support and boundaries

BEHAVIOURAL DIFFICULTIES (12–18 YEARS)

Common signs in adolescents
Increased irritability, defiance, or withdrawal
May push boundaries to assert independence
Engages in risk-taking (e.g., substance use, unsafe online behaviour)
Struggles with peer pressure and self-image
May experience sleep, appetite, or mood changes
Displays school refusal, academic decline, or disengagement
Internalising behaviours like anxiety, depression, or self-harm may emerge

Home strategies
Maintain open, respectful communication—listen more than lecture
Balance independence with clear, fair boundaries and expectations
Model and encourage emotional regulation
Monitor online activity and peer influences
Be alert to mental health warning signs and seek professional support early
Encourage physical activity, creative expression, and peer connection

Classroom strategies
Create a safe, respectful environment where individuality is valued
Support emotional wellbeing through mentoring or pastoral care
Offer choices and flexibility to encourage responsibility
Identify and support students showing disengagement or emotional distress
Promote inclusion and address peer dynamics respectfully
Maintain communication with families and support services

Online resources for parents
Raising Children Network – www.raisingchildren.net.au
Headspace – www.headspace.org.au
ReachOut Australia – www.au.reachout.com
eSafety Commissioner (for online safety) – www.esafety.gov.au
Parentline – www.parentline.com.au

Book: The Whole-Brain Child by Dan Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson
Book: Untangled by Lisa Damour (specifically for adolescent girls)
Book: He’ll Be OK by Celia Lashlie (for adolescent boys)